Random thoughts.😳

STOP JUDGING FOR GOD’S SAKE !

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Okay , Hey , generally I don’t write posts like this one. But I really wanted to come up with this topic , I don’t know from where to begin but Here it goes…

She is so fat , she must be eating a lot ” I have heard people saying this behind my back.
Yes I am fat , but no I don’t eat alot. I have a NORMAL diet. I don’t remember how many times my mom used to scold me for skipping lunch and dinners . I once fell sick for not eating 2 days in order to become fit from fat.

She is not going to burn the floor , she is going to break it
I remember one of my classmate saying this to me just before my dance performance in 12th grade. I got conscious and was hell scared during the performance and even forgot few steps. It resulted in developing a stage fear in me , yes , I don’t take part in any dance or any stage related competitions now. Although I dance a lot with people I am comfortable with.

Why don’t you join gym and do some exercise ?” , people have often advised me
I do exercise and love going to gym. It does make me feel active. But some things are not under your control . 

You should wear loose t-shirts , you will look slim in them “
Why would I have to look slim ? I am fat and I accept this fact.

Don’t mess with me , I have the most strongest person in my team “
Well , I can be the most most heaviest person in your team but  strongest ? Naah I am the most sensitive person you will ever meet.

With this figure , you’re never going to find a perfect groom for yourself “ , I remember one of my friend saying this to me.

Okay , this one was new for me. I was hurt , deeply! And this was not the first time anyone has pointed about my weight and marriage together.

what has weight to do with my marriage ? I am not going to marry one with a mentality like that ! ” I answered him.

Everyone have the same mentality when it comes to marriage , everyone wants to marry a perfect partner ” he said.

I was numb after that.

I wondered what does the word perfect mean? And I ended up googling ” Definition of perfect ” that night , ABSOLUTE COMPLETE it said. Am I not complete ?
FAULTLESS it said . Is it my fault that I am fat ?

There were many more instances from childhood to now. I have felt  humiliated , embarrassed , shattered , bullied and so on….

There were times I used to hate myself for being fat. I used to think I am the most ugliest one among my friends. I used to be so nervous every now and then. I used to be so scared even while saying ” present sir ” , so as to not get into anyone’s attention.

I were given names like ” doraemon ” , “chota – bheem ” etc.. etc…  I have cried alot because of that. I remember one of my P.T.I teacher insulting me infront of the whole class  because of my weight. I had lost all the confidence that day and this is the reason why I end up being nervous all the time. I was scared of going to school after that until the day I told my father about this. He gave me strength to face them.

There are many people like me who are being judged & joked upon , bullied & humiliated. I just want to say that

STOP CRITICIZING YOURSELF & YOUR APPEARANCE AND START BEING THANKFUL . Perfection is a myth. You are perfect the way you are. Shaming yourself for a piece of fat , for your body color or bone showing doesn’t help anything. There’s a lot more beauty in you than ugly.

P.S : Sexy or fat ,
         Fair or dark ,
         Virgin or not ,
         Start respecting everyone !
  Yes , EVERYONE irrespective of their caste , gender or skin color. And people please just STOP JUDGING FOR GOD’S SAKE !

        – Unnati Madan

79 thoughts on “STOP JUDGING FOR GOD’S SAKE !

  1. Very well said. 🙂 Inner beauty, values and character is more important. The way we treat people counts more than how we appear physically… we should all respect and accept each other AND our own selves. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Hi, it was really insightful reading your post and I am so glad you shared this. I am so sorry for the things that have been said to you. You are perfect, no matter of your size. I used to be really skinny and then I put on some weight. I thought I looked better, healthier. However, I got a lot of comments about it which made me feel so ashamed that I just stopped eating and was exercising. I ended up with an eating disorder and mentally I was drained, I was so unwell. I hope one day everyone can be accepted for their body. I’m a lot better now, but I always think about the shame of eating an extra portion or more calories than I should and its because of these type of people. Thank you, Unnati.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Glad that I Could connect with you…. 😍
      I too wish that one day Everyone can be accepted for their body but the fact is one need to accept his/her body the way it is , and the day that happens people’s opinion will not matter.
      Thank you for reading and sharing your story 💗 means a Lot😘

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Really nice reading your post..very insightful and true as people will always judge and talk when you’re during right or wrong ☺

    Liked by 1 person

  4. You know from where did this slim trim concept start??
    Like we all know that the heroins in earlier movies used to be much healthier… However, once a fashion designer came up with a strategy.
    As his dresses where on less demand he decided to market them, and for this he asked his workers to bring girls that were as slim as hangers so that no one would see their face but the concentration would be the dress.
    People got so mad that now every girl wants to be slim.
    We can see where we went wrong there ha??

    And even I am a healthy one…I can totally connect to this article… But when you start loving yourself, no one can bother you…❤
    Don’t give ppl a shit and love yourself…😊

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for sharing the story💗
      Glad that I could connect with you 💗 thank you for appreciating 😘 means a lot 😍

      The problem is not being slim trim , the problem is being judged. People even don’t spare those so called perfect slim trim actresses. They had judged , and they will judge. Its upon you how you will take it ☺ kuch toh log kahengey … logo ka kaam hai kehna ☺

      Liked by 1 person

  5. It’s great that your wrote this! People should start changing their views. It’s high time. And it really doesn’t matter whether you’re fat or skinny, dark or fair. You’re beautiful just the way you are. And those who think you’re not, tell them they’re the ugliest sort ever!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I support the motion! Well said. I stand by each of your word here. One is at fault if one doesn’t work towards betterment, but DEFINITELY not at fault if one fails to achieve the desired result. Ignore the haters, keep making the world beautiful in your own unique way.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. We’ll never run out of people with sick mentality. But what they don’t know is…we’ll still choose to shine🌸🌟 You go girrrrl!❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  8. You go lovely! It is so so great that you feel happy within your own body. That is amazing, and you really should love yourself because you are great. Love love the post, and I am so sorry you have had to put up with all those horrible things said to you. Just know they will never be true 💕

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Dear Unnati.. you have brought up such a topic today… it is amazing.. and you know what, I want to apologize for being judging people sometimes.. Yes, and I now take pride in saying that after reading your post, I will never judge anyone. As i said today, I am not perfect but still I am open to learn from my mistakes. I too have been judged many a times in my life.. people made fun of me for various reasons and yes, I felt hurt.. you know may be we are brought up this way to judge others. we see others doing it and we follow the path without putting our own brains into the matter. it happens subconsciously…. I am glad, you have bring this to light.. for now, I am going to consciously make an effort not to judge people for no rhyme and reason.. Loads of love… I hope you accept my apologies for being judgmental a few times in the past, but i promise not to carry on with the tradition no more…

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Perfection is a myth. It’s sad that judgement is part of the human condition however if we can only remember that if we can’t say anything nice then say nothing at all we would better people. Bullying has been around probably from the beginning of time and I believe the bullies behave in this manner because there is something lacking within themselves that they cannot feel good unless they are tearing someone else down. Hold your head up high and know that you are perfect as you are or as I like to say “perfectly imperfect” as none of us are perfection. Kudos to you for writing such a introspective piece. Have a nice weekend!! ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Love how you’ve put something that’s very necessary to be spoken, but hardly is ever spoken about! Everyone should respect everybody regardless of their views, opinions, appearance, anything.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. I wonder sometimes, if all were fat then everyone would have joked about the slim ones. it is not an opinion or truth but the tendency of certain people to comment on the different one..and one should be proud in being unique and different when walking among the sheep herd..
    very nicely written, and everything you said shows your wisdom..
    regards
    shreyans

    Liked by 1 person

    1. But no one is different , no one is unique by the way they look. One can only be unique by their deeds , and the mentality. We all are a part of sheep herd , a fat sheep or a slim doesn’t matter !
      Thank you for reading ❤

      Like

  13. not different in looks..but the difference in the ability to admire yourself, even if you are fat or tall or too slim, it is your perspective which should be different..and that will make you shine in the herd..
    regards
    shreyans

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Wonderful post Unnati ! Nobody is perfect and hence everyone should learn to keep their judgemental selves locked up in some dungeon. Your post reminded me of this wonderful quote by Steve Maraboli, “There is nothing more rare, nor more beautiful, than a woman being unapologetically herself; comfortable in her perfect imperfection. To me, that is the true essence of beauty.”

    Liked by 1 person

  15. A post that can span multiple generations and cultures. Great work! Keep up the heartfelt posts that allow readers to connect with your own personal thoughts and experiences. Everyone needs to realize people are individuals with hearts and personalities. Hurtful words and opinions are not welcomed!

    I’d love to get your thoughts on my blog (https://smm2016blog.wordpress.com). I’m always looking for feedback on how to improve viewership, so if you have advise, please let me know!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Oh shut up. She ran away crying to her mother. You don’t see a 21 year old do that everyday xD

        Like

      2. Is it wrong to wanna do someone hard all the while wanting to punch them in the face?

        Like

  16. despite everything good or worse I am, when I read you love, it calms me down. Your writings have a calming effect you know that?

    Like

  17. god I wish you were born a little late, that you were 17; and that I was fat. I would’ve asked you out. We could’ve been a couple, you know, you and me :*

    Like

  18. Very well put!! Children are horrible adults are worse and this media driven fat shaming is ruining lives. I’m by no means slim and I k ow better but I still feel the trapping gs of the slender elite. Be true to yourself be that wonderful interesting person and enjoy life how you see fit. For the first time in years in brave enough to take off my shirt as I laze under the sun on a rare sunny day. It’s accepting who you are and disregarding thr pettyness of others and living. Humanity doesn’t have just one direction why should it have one shape. Great piece!!

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Very well said sweetie, as long as you are proud of yourself then that’s all that matters, if you are healthy, which it sounds like you are, your actual appearance doesn’t make a difference so they can suck it

    Liked by 1 person

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